The kids have such magical moments when playing in the bathtub, last night as I was watching them play I felt compelled to capture it.
Julia: ”It’s a slobbery poop making the poop go aaaalllll over the towel because we’re bad dinosaurs.”
James: ”We washed all the poop off-”
Julia: ”-but you can’t wash it aaaalllll off-”
James: ”-because the water is purple, and if he goes into the purple stuff he gets covered in poop.” Mom sniggers and runs to get a notebook and a pen with which to capture this moment.
“I’m playing in my poop.
I’m stepping in my poop.
I’m squishing in my poop.
It’s so much fun to play in poop.
I like to smell my poop.
I play in my poop every day-ay-ay.”
Mom pauses to lift an eyebrow and takes a deep breath. Begins wondering about the sanity of children.
James (in a commanding voice): ”Ugh. I need to start all over. Good. Good. Just push it out, Sir.
Julia says sweetly: ”You don’t mind if I make more poop? I have a poop collection. I just keep making more!”
James: ”We’re, like, underwater and I poop and pretend I pooped in my bed and then we went for breakfast. Now we’re on a submarine and it brought us to the center of danger. And there’s lots of danger there…
(Mom: Hmm… are we done with poop finally?)
…I’m putting poop on this guy (makes squishy sound effects).”
Julia squeals: ”HEY! That’s MY poop!”
The moral? Poop is pretty amazing shit. And, kids are nucking futs.